Friday, August 22, 2008
4 Months Waiting
This coming Sunday, the 24th, marks 4 months of waiting for a referral for our daughter. It would be quite humorous to know the thoughts (a bit neurotic I must admit) that I find myself having throughout the days as we wait for "the call" about our referral. Our adoption agency, Gladney, is based in Texas and is an hour behind us (we are Eastern time) and I find myself thinking about the day in terms of what time it is in Texas. At 8am when I arrive at work I think to myself that I know it is only 7 am in Texas so we won't reasonably get "the call" for at least an hour. When it comes lunch time I know that it is 11 am in Texas and "the call" could happen. I spend my lunch hour eating lunch and stalking blogs and talk groups to see if anyone has gotten a referral that day.
When I get home at 4pm I know that it is 3pm in Texas and the "the call" could still come. By the time 6pm comes and still no call I know that it won't happen for the day. I find myself looking at blogs of people that have gotten "the call" to see if there is a common day or time that the elusive call seems to come. Whenever my wife calls me at work I get this feeling that it might be the call about "the call", whenever my phone rings and the caller ID says "unknown". I know this all sounds like stark raving madness, but I wanted to share a little insight into what can happen if we allow our thoughts to stray too far from utter dependence on God and his perfect timing. The wait for our referral has caused us to focus our attention on God and how we must surrender all to him. We know these truths; that God's timing is perfect, that he does all things according to his own good will, that we should be anxious for nothing and that we should rely on him. It is in the past couple of weeks that I have been struggling to keep my mind disciplined to focus not on our anxiety, but on the perfect will of God. Please pray that we will think the way that we ought.
We have been so blessed this week by our church family. We have had many opportunities to spend time with our church family as we share the bountiful harvest from our little homestead here at Rainbow Acres. We are thankful to God for the way that he has blessed us this year. I continue to be thankful for all of you that leave comments here on the blog and those of you whose blogs we spend time reading (stalking), I appreciate the thoughtfulness of all of you.